It's a year unlike any other and Thanksgiving is kicking off the holiday season that is sure to be anything but traditional. It’s easy to focus on the negative. We’ve been continually challenged this year from a global pandemic, civil unrest and political divisiveness. Although it feels safe to be cautiosuly optimistic that we're on the brink of stepping into better days, we are also still in the thick of the struggle with many aspects - 2020 isn't winning any popularity contests anytime soon.
I do, however, think that this year has its own set of unique blessings. Of course our big one was learning that we were expecting our second baby due to arrive next month. Planning for and anticipating his or her arrival gave us a sweet silver lining and a 9 month distraction. We also spent a lot more time together as a family. While Matt had previously worked onsite at Boeing and Sterling was set up for some nanny time and eventually preschool, our plans changed and we all got to stay together. Our time together just the three of us will be one of the things I'll look back on most fondly this year. Matt had the opportunity to see firsthand a lot of Sterling's growth and development versus me trying to recap things with pictures and videos.
Our house saw a lot of progress with various projects we'd been wanting to tackle. From big ones like the basement remodel and clearing out our backyard, to smaller ones like recovering an old couch and replacing various light fixtures. The house continues to feel more like our own. It's felt like home for awhile already, but the more we update it to our personal tastes, the more I find I'm attached to it as a haven for relaxing, making memories and spending cherished time with our growing family.
While both Matt and I have felt distance grow with some friendships, I also feel like some of them really flourished. Whether it was seeking advice for parenting which lead to more frequent conversations, or just general check ins, I'm thankful for the chance to reconnect with some old friends this year and create new friendships. Closeness doesn’t have to mean physical proximity. If there’s anything I’ve learned, it’s that you can be there for one another through different means, and sometimes the more creative, the better!
I’ve felt the power and importance of having tough conversations. It’s ok to bring up the uncomfortable. I think we’ve all seen the social and civil progress made from those who were willing to step up and ruffle some feathers. While I might have previously swept something under the rug, I think there is so much to be gained by approaching hard topics. Matt and I have had some of our best conversations this year. I’ve gotten more insight to how he sees things, and it’s also broadened my perspective thanks to his being open to sharing his thoughts on a topic. I feel more empowered to stand up for myself to others when I see or feel something that isn't right. Where I might have previously wished a hard conversation would just take care of itself and magically go away, I've learned that advocating for fairness and for yourself is something that everyone should feel strong enough to do.
I’ve learned to value the beauty in simplicity.
This year I found that I appreciated small things that had been previously overlooked or taken for granted. From things as simple as sugar or flour available again at the grocery store (something I never thought I’d say), to the first meal we enjoyed at a restaurant after quarantine, to finally getting to see extended family after many months. It’s given me a greater appreciation for previous generations who lived their lifetime getting by with much less (not just living through the struggle of one year). The family stories we have of grandparents living through war and poverty mean more now. Having experienced just a sliver of the challenges they faced, I have so much more respect for their strength and tenacity. It’s not through abundance that we gain gratitude for what we have, but the times that these things are taken away that we realize how good things really are. (And perhaps, that our priorities were in need of shifting all along. I’ve found the things I thought were really important, are not so necessary after all.)
I hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving and don’t forget to tell your loved ones how you feel about them today. I promise it will mean the world to them!
photos by Matthew Land
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